I couldn't haven't even come close to coming up with such a succinct desciption of the nausiating wave that has swept across from the trendsetting borough of Willamsburg NY, to the fair isles of the wet UK of being a "hipster". It has become a diluted version of the hipster in its original form, to say the least. But without them, (the original Hipsters,) we would't be able to coin the infuriating level and rise of the NORMCORES.
You'll see them, you'll most likely know one, in fact you may even unwittingly BE one. If you believe you need to really know the origin of your coffee and the eco-footprint of your delivery from waitrose, there is a good chance you have been brought into the normcore fold.
Allow me to extend the description further, do you think that something your teenage daughter is wearing would possibly be a good look on you, and are you over 30 and have you bought something from topshop? The stakes are rising for you then... It's the trend to LOOK like a hipster, to behave like a hipster, to purchase the lifestyle and desires of a hipster, to voice your opinions of shunning mainstream employment and believe you should embrace your inner "nerd" and wear some geek glasses... with clear glass in them.
REAL hipsters decided that as they DID need to wear specs, they would shy away from the norm of being embarrassed by them, kick-back against the rimless, lightweight frame and really go all out. They were rebelling against the popular culture at the time. Little did they know that their sub-culture would rise and rise to become popular trend-defining and leading stuff.
I feel sorry for the real hipsters. They had care and thought and they were genuine about the neck tattoo they got, (when only lifers in prison and violent gang members had them), and I don't mean those who have been tattooing often since they turned 19, I mean the normcores who think - "I can be cool, and hip and trendy and fashionable, I can rebel against the system - heres my super cool tattoo to prove I'm Hipster like the best of you."
They felt passionate about being the only one of their friends who rode a bicycle anywhere, and not a brand new super-posh road bike, but some tiny, no-name, no-brand-something-their-cool-friend-in-berlin-customised-for-them bike.... I bet they never thought that some moons forward those "customised" bikes would be available off the rack, online and delivered to your suburban door in Chelsea.
Ah - the posh normcores... possibly the worst offenders, driving their oh-so-gritty Land Rover defenders, (brand new of course), wearing their oh-so-cool Zadig & Voltaire over-priced cashmere, that they bought looking distressed and their $300 jeans... that Erin Wasson wears.
It doesn't matter how much they try and deny it, these are the absolute pinnacles of normcorers. The desire to look like they are bucking the Boden trend, not wanting to be judged on how perfect their parenting skills are by not wearing Whistles and instead embracing their inner lost teenager.
I fear for where the lost real sub-culture of Hipster-ville will naturally fend back to. They must reclaim their sub-culture of non-conformity, but how??
There could be an infinite number of ways, but unfortunately with the ever encompassing existence of our social media and instant connectivity NOTHING stays sacredly secret for a nano-second. You could tell your friends how passionate you are about a new artist that has just returned from travelling in the uncharted jungle with glorious unique works of art and have decided to make... hats... Those 'hats' would be so achingly cool that Topshop and Century 21 would have them on their production lines in weeks... That earthy artist might have been perfecting that unique design acquired on their travels, only to have someone tweet it, instagram it, pininterst it and add to to their tumblr and facebook feed - KERPOW - its old news and hot property...
You poor hipsters, maybe the normcores have it right, in this day and digital era, following really is the ONLY option.